Keep Calm and Don't Be a Dick Candle | Funny Soy Candle Gift | Sarcastic Home Decor
Clean Cotton / 9oz
$14.99
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Light up the room with humor and amazing fragrance. This "Keep Calm and Don't Be a Dick" scented candle delivers the perfect blend of cheeky attitude and premium aromatherapy — because life's too short for fake niceness and cheap candles.
Why This Candle Stands Out:
Sometimes you need to set boundaries with style. This hilarious yet sophisticated candle features bold, unapologetic text on a glossy permanent label that won't peel or fade. It's the conversation starter your coffee table has been missing and the reminder everyone needs: just don't be a dick. Simple wisdom, beautifully packaged.
Premium Quality You Can Feel:
Made with 100% natural soy wax blend that burns cleaner and longer than traditional paraffin candles. The pure cotton wick provides an even, consistent burn without the black soot or harsh chemicals. Each 9oz candle is housed in a sleek glass jar (2.8″ × 3.5") that looks elevated on any shelf, desk, or nightstand.
Choose Your Signature Scent:
Select from 12 immersive aromatic fragrances to match your mood or space. Whether you prefer calming lavender, energizing citrus, cozy vanilla, fresh linen, or something uniquely you — there's a scent that transforms your room into a sanctuary. All scents feature the same clean wax color for a consistent aesthetic.
Long-Lasting Burn Time:
Enjoy 50-60 hours of burn time per candle — that's weeks of ambiance, relaxation, and subtle life advice. The slow, even burn means you get maximum value and fragrance throw from first light to final flicker.
Safety & Quality Standards:
Compliant with ASTM safety standards and assembled in the USA from globally sourced materials. This isn't a rushed product — it's a carefully crafted home accessory that meets rigorous safety testing.
Perfect Gift For:
Your brutally honest best friend, coworkers with a sense of humor, housewarming parties, white elephant exchanges, therapist appreciation, anyone who needs a laugh, sarcastic gift lovers, stressed-out friends who need candle therapy with a side of real talk.
The Perfect Occasions:
Birthday gifts, holiday stocking stuffers, "thinking of you" care packages, office Secret Santa, galentine's day, friendship appreciation, thank you gifts for real ones, or treating yourself because you deserve it.
.: Materials: 100% natural soy wax blend, 100% cotton wick and a glass jar
.: One size: 2.8″ × 3.5" (7.1cm × 8.9cm)
.: Compliant with ASTM safety standards
.: Burning time: 50-60 hours
.: Glossy permanent adhesive label
.: Choose from 12 different aromatic scents
.: Assembled in the USA from globally sourced parts
.: Please note: All scents have the same wax color
Keep Calm and Don't Be a Dick Candle | Funny Soy Candle Gift | Sarcastic Home Decor
$14.99